Traits

Day Forty-One: To Blog or Blob? That is the Question.

| Aspergers Girls
The Blob Lives!

People with Aspergers incorporate different coping strategies in order to feel more comfortable. This post, I am pleased to report, is a fine example of such coping strategies, including:

  1. Humor
  2. Data Organization
  3. Tangents
  4. Analysis of Self
  5. Correction/Editing of Self
  6. Analysis of Others
  7. Research
  8. Interconnection of Data
  9. Data transformed into New Information

My original intention today was to report on how my blog has become a mind- and time-devouring entity, closely resembling the indistinct, formless entity from the movie The BLOB.


But, instead I deleted an entire, page-long list that had words such as: obsession, fixation, ice pack for shoulder pain, eyestrain, fear, and extreme anxiety. And replaced this here posting with the land of the blob. Which I know, and you know, has a much higher fascination-factor than a post about obsessive blogging.

Unfortunately, I planned on writing for only 30 minutes today, and instead I am further made blurry-eyed and pain-ridden. Once again, I was sucked in and consumed by my BLOG! The HORROR!

At this moment as I am typing, I have my computer in split-screen mode, and I’m watching the 1958 horror flick The Blob. If you are in the X Generation, there is a high probability that The Blob, (which was originally titled the Glob), rates in the top ten of all time horror flicks.  In the movie, an alien life form consumes everything in its path. As the blob devours, it continues to grow in size, until it resembles one massive lump of blood-red Jell-O. When the movie ends, the blob is dropped into the Arctic. Then a big question mark (?) appears on the screen, leaving little kids from the 1960’s and 1970’s to wonder forever, if the blog is in fact living in bedroom closets, streets, under beds, and in toilets.

Just think: if those Generation Xers had been told the blob was only a modified weather balloon and colored silicone gel, we’d have saved a lot of money on mental health therapy.

The movie makes me think of the words heebie-jeebies and jeepers-creepers, both words that Louis Armstrong has perfected, by the way.

I’m still watching the movie, and finding the scenes rather dull. Waiting for the blob to show up.

 

Here are some conclusions I reached from the data I collected from BLOB research.  

1. People who saw the Blob were scared shi*less!

I’ll need to buy tons of ice and fire extinguishers before I’ll ever feel safe again.

I saw this movie about 30 years ago, but was so scared that I ran out of the cinema before I could see the end!

I used to wonder about the question mark. I saw tons of horror movies when I was a kid, but seriously, not one of them scared me half as much as this one.

I wouldn’t call myself lucky. This movie scared the crap out of me so bad that I had to sleep with my mommy!

I was 5 years old and it knocked me out. I had nightmares for two weeks.

I saw this movie when I was a child and alone with my brother. I was so scared. I’m still having nightmares.

Saw it on TV way back in 1975 ,scared the crap outta me too! What can kill it?

I remember this movie scaring the crap out of me when I was a kid. And it was almost 30 years old by the time I saw it.

Omg, I remember this movie used to scare the hell out of me.

This movie scared me to death when I was a kid. After seeing it I couldn’t eat cherry Jell-O for weeks.

Well, for people back then, it was creepy as hell.

I think if it were real those people would run away and crap their pants.

When I saw this movie on the tv as a kid, it literally scared the piss out! of me. I woke up screaming and peed my nightgown.

2. People don’t like older men playing teenagers, even if the guy is sexy.

Looks like he’s pushing 30 and he has to sneak out of his parent’s house?

Yeah, Steve McQueen is the oldest looking ‘teenager’ I’ve ever seen.

Steve McQueen is supposed to be 17 in this movie and he was 27!

He hangs around with these teenage boys and he looks like their uncle!

McQueen is the sexiest man in history of men.

He’s supposed to play a teenager in this movie? They could have chosen someone who didn’t look 50 years old.

I like way they keep calling Steve a crazy Kid!!!.Shit he is as old as the old.

Steve McQueen was and still is ‘The Man’!

The old guy is so damn cute.

Are there nude photos of Steve?

3. People reminisce when they see old movies from the 1950’s.

In those days boys had good manners and girls behaved like well children.

Back then, when you missed something on TV that was it, until you caught it again.

Wow, 1950’s, I wish to see that day and die in the 50’s.

Remember when there was a vibrant healthy middle class and anyone notice the COLORFUL clothing and cars? Look at how many people wear black today and drive gray cars. And go down any Main Street USA today and see the poverty and boarded up windows…

4. People side with or personify Blob.

If I were an alien from another planet and I had an ignorant old piece of white trash poking me with a stick, I’d devour him, too!!

What kind of an idiot goes outside and pokes at a lugee?

This music leaves me with the impression that the Blob’s a suave, fun-loving guy who’d stop eating towns if you just got him a cigarette and a nice cocktail.

That Blob sure is a cool cat!

My sister had a girl friend she called the blob.

5. People theorize about the future of the Blob.

“As long as the arctic stays cold,,,” Ha ha, it’s like they we’re already setting up a sequel to be released whenever global warming thawed the arctic.

I still wonder why there was a question mark at the end.

Well, even if the ice caps were to melt, the arctic would still remain too cold.Then again, the blob could just float like a big ice-cube and drift out towards warmer waters in the sea.

Imagine that thing in the water eating whales and big, big things in the sea. It will be unstoppable.

Shit! Global warming is gonna set the blob free and it’ll either start with the Scandinavians, the Russians or the Canadians…

(These are all quotes I found under comments beneath the video clips on YouTube.)

Last thought. My Giant Question Mark:

1. I’m wondering if the search term crap will bring people to my blog now. And I’m thinking: Oh, Crap!

Thirty-Seven: 10 Myths About Females With Asperger’s Syndrome

| Aspergers Girls

Hello All.

I hope you are well during these challenging times.

I am writing to provide a few updates (2020) for anyone who happens upon this homepage.

My third blog is a bit hard to find, since I changed the domain name. Here is the direct link to Everyday Autistic. My artist’s blog is Belly of a Star.

Here is the Autistic Trait’s List.

Here is my company website Spectrum Suite LLC, which includes 100s of resources and our services page.

Here is a link to one of my Linkedin Articles that will bring you to my profile and some articles there!

My new works include much advocacy for Universal Design in the Workplace, which equates to true inclusivity, where all employees are given opportunity to the same support measures and community engagement, such as the same best-practices interviews, job coaches, support team; not just one marginalized minority, e.g., autistic individuals.

I am working on a book on empowerment on the autism spectrum.

I am my waving from afar, and wishing you so very well! I cannot believe it’s been 8 YEARS!

I now call myself a ‘neuro-minoriy’ (coined by Judy Singer) and consider myself a neurodivergent-blend (coined by me!). I am neurodivergent-blend because of my autistic profile, gifted-intellect diagnosis, dyslexia, dyspraxia, OCD, etc. etc. etc.

Feel free to connect on twitter or Facebook.

I’m on the bottom right, in the photo below, speaking at the Stanford Neurodiversity Summit. You can find out what we’ve been up to on the website. Here is a 10 hr.+ video of Day 2 at the Summit!

My book is now available around the world in paperback! Check out Barnes and Noble or Amazon.

Everyday Aspergers is an unusual and powerful exploration of one woman’s marvelously lived life. Reminiscent of the best of Anne Lamott, Everyday Aspergers jumps back and forth in time through a series of interlocking vignettes that give insight and context to her lived experience as an autistic woman. The humor and light touch is disarming, because underneath light observations and quirky moments are buried deep truths about the human experience and about her own work as an autistic woman discerning how to live her best life. From learning how to make eye contact to finding ways to communicate her needs to being a dyslexic cheerleader and a fraught mother of also-autistic son, Samantha Craft gives us a marvelous spectrum of experiences. Highly recommended for everyone to read — especially those who love people who are just a little different.”~ Ned Hayes, bestselling author of The Eagle Tree

10 Myths About Females With Aspergers

1. Aspergers is Easy to Spot

Females with Aspergers are often superb actresses. They’ve either trained themselves how to behave in hopes of fitting in with others and/or they avoid social situations. Many grown women with Aspergers are able to blend into a group without notice.

2. Professionals Understand Aspergers

No two people are alike. Professionals have limited experience, if any experience, with females with Aspergers. Professionals have limited resources, limited prior instruction and education, and little support regarding the subject of Aspergers. Comorbid conditions with Aspergers are complex. Females seeking professional help are often overlooked, and sometimes belittled or misdiagnosed.

3. An Effective Diagnosis Tool Exists for Females with Aspergers

There is no blood or DNA test for Aspergers. No one knows what causes Aspergers or if Aspergers is actually a condition, and not just a way of looking at the world differently. The diagnostic tools, such as surveys, are based on male-dominant Aspergers’ traits that do not take into account how the female’s brain and the female’s role in society differs from the male experience. Diagnosis is largely based on relatives’ observations and individual case history, and is determined by professionals who often do not understand the female traits of the syndrome.

4. People with Aspergers Lack Empathy

Females with Aspergers usually have a great deal of empathy for animals, nature, and people.  A female’s (with Aspergers) specific facial features, body language, tone of voice, laughter, and word choice might result in an observer misjudging a female’s (with Aspergers) thoughts, feelings, and intentions. Women and girls with Aspergers are often deep philosophical thinkers, poets, and writers—all traits that require a sense of empathy. Females with Aspergers usually try very hard to relate another’s experience to their own experience, in hopes of gaining understanding.

5. People with Aspergers are Like a Television Character

Many individuals have learned not to compare an ethnic minority group to a character on television, because such comparison is a form of stereotyping and racism. However, people are comparing male fictional characters on television to females with Aspergers. This happens usually without intention to harm, but out of a desire to understand. People with Aspergers aren’t living in a sitcom. There is a need for a greater degree of understanding beyond observing an entertainer.

6. Aspergers is No Big Deal

People with Aspergers often face daily challenges. There is no magic pill to make an Aspergers brain think differently. People with Aspergers see the world in another way than the majority. Females with Aspergers are not different in a way that needs to be improved. They are different in a way that requires support, empathy, and understanding from the mainstream. Aspergers is a big deal. The diagnosis can bring varying degrees of grief, acceptance, depression, confusion, closure, and epiphany. Here are just a few of the conditions a female with Aspergers might experience: sensory difficulties, OCD, phobias, anxiety, fixations, intense fear, rapid-thinking, isolation, depression, low self-esteem, self-doubt, chronic fatigue, IBS, shame, confusion, trauma, abuse, bullying, and/or loss of relationships.

7. Aspergers Doesn’t Exist

Aspergers does exist. There is a subgroup of females all exhibiting and experiencing almost the exact same traits. If there is no Aspergers then something dynamic is happening to hundreds upon hundreds of women; this something, whatever one chooses to label the collection of traits, requires immediate evaluation, understanding, support, educational resources, and coping mechanisms.

8. There are More Males than Females with Aspergers

In regards to comparing females and males with Aspergers, just like our history textbooks, more males are in the spotlight than females. Males are typically the doctors, professionals, and researches of Aspergers—males that do not have Aspergers and who obviously aren’t females. Thousands of females with Aspergers remain undiagnosed. Hundreds of women are searching social networks and the Internet daily for answers, connection, and understanding about themselves and/or their daughters.

9. Females with Aspergers Don’t Make Good Friends

Females with Aspergers are all different. Just like everyone else, they have their quirks and idiosyncrasies.  Many females with Aspergers are known for their loyalty, honesty, hard work ethics, compassion, kindness, intelligence, empathy, creativity, and varied interests and knowledge base. Females with Aspergers, like anyone, have the capacity to make fantastic friends, coworkers, and spouses, if, and when, they are treated with respect, love, understanding, and compassion.

10. Aspergers isn’t Something that Affects My Life

More and more children are being diagnosed with Aspergers. Adult males and females are realizing they have the traits of Aspergers Syndrome. The rise in Aspergers is a financial strain on the educational system and medical system. There isn’t adequate information, support, and resources available to assist people with Aspergers and their families. There is probably someone in your local community who has Aspergers Syndrome. You can make a difference. Just share your knowledge and understanding. Pass on this list of myths or other resources.

Ten Traits of Females with Aspergers link

Taken by Sam Craft

			

	


				
					


	

			
Thirty-Three: The Celery String is Alive! Personification Pondering.
		

				

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For those of you wondering: Yes, I do have a life outside of processing what’s going on inside my head. It’s just that, at the moment, what’s going on inside my head is extremely fascinating. Just so you know, I did just return from my city’s quaint downtown, with a cheese puff and apple fritter in hand, from the best bakery this side of the western states. And, I might add, I had a hot brewed cup of coffee with just a tad of nutmeg. This, after partaking in a relaxing venue atop the acupuncturist’s cushioned table. The coffee is about to kick in, so I will try to make this fast, as to not dial into manic-mode. I’m one of those types that given a drop of coffee, becomes frantically intense and even more interesting, in that peculiar, glad-I’m-not her, kind of way. I’ve been known to rearrange an entire room, sometimes clean for eight hours straight, given the adequate amount of particular slow-roasted beverage. Coffee is certainly and enigma of our time. I wonder what substance or activity will eventually replace the black gold as our source of rapture and excuse for social gatherings.


I cried all the way home from the bakery, while balancing my coffee, and listening to Jars of Clay. I’ve listened to the same song some 100 times in the last couple of weeks. Finally thought it was time to share the song. I added the video at the end of this post. Though I have reservations, as the group is Christian. Reservations only because I fret you might not listen for that reason alone. Which is sad. Because I’d like you to hear the song, for no other reason but to connect to my experience and feel supported, by whatever support that brings you peace. (For my thoughts on spirituality/religion press HERE.) Because when I listen to the song I picture us all together in a large non-denominational, unconditional-love stadium, think the 1970’s, with our arms up swaying back and forth to the music, and supporting one another through this experience someone once named life.


Sometimes I picture us holding white candles, until I think of the fumes, the potential fire hazard, and the possibility of wax dripping all over my arm. In my vision, we are weeping, in the same way I wept all the way home this morning while wailing aloud to the song—there has to be a word for that huge release of energy that comes from a good cry, the type of cry that explodes with love and knowing that we are not alone. The type of cry that means: I made it to the other side, and I’m still standing! And here we are standing together.


Anyhow, that’s how I was crying. There has to be a word.  Maybe: vociferating restitution (wailing with gain-based recovery) combined with hue and cry, (loud public outcry). Restferating Hue! That works. I had a huge restferating hue!


Part of the restferating hue was in response to a video clip I watched yesterday. The other part was the freedom I felt in no longer being connected to the heavy energy from the university. And, yet another, very important piece, is being able to connect with people like you. Well, not like you, but YOU.


Today I would like to plan a gargantuan of a party to celebrate the freedom I am feeling. I think of hosting a party quite often, for you all, in my town in Washington, in the best weather-month ever—August.  I’ve said before that I love to plan a party. Not to be at the party, per say, but plan the party.




I imagine the whole of the gathering would be quite the happening. Everything would have to be very well thought out, though. I’m thinking sunglasses and hats, lounge chairs with pillows, soft lightening, definitely name tags, and for certain the use of inside-voices. NO perfumes. NO loud clothing or squeaky shoes. No toenails showing, hair just so, as to not be visually distracting. Sorry, no children—they are far too unpredictable (in a good way).


All attendees need be double-showered, maybe wearing name tags on their backside as well.  And background checks would be beneficial. Crazy frog is laughing! (Press LINGO BUTTON, if you’re new to my rambling.)


I do imagine meeting you. Our conventions would be a hoot. I don’t think I can do the entire dialogue, LV’s got going on in her head, justice, as I’d have to wean out a lot of material that LV is giggling about. But let’s just say there is a lot of sensory-issues and people-watching, and tons of brutal honesty.


“How was your flight?”


“Crappy!”


“What’s your greatest fear?”


“Standing here talking to you!”


“If you could be doing anything right now. What would you be doing?”


“Running the other direction.”


Like I said, LV is having a laughing fit!


The BBC video that LV was all happy and get-up-and-go about, introduced the most precious little girl who spoke about personification. Personification: giving human traits (qualities, feelings, action, or characteristics) to non-living objects (things, colors, qualities, or ideas). For example: The rain-covered window is crying. The verb, crying, is a human action. A window is a non-living object.


This discovery is getting a bit too emotional. Just a minute.


I’m back. Crazy Frog is doing deep breathing exercises, and looks so darn adorable with his green bubble chest inflating so. He’s quite muscular. Let’s all take a deep breath and relax the shoulders, shall we? Better.


I have this thing (there’s no better word I can think of) I do, that I’ve always done, that the little girl in the video does, in a similar fashion.


For the longest time, before knowing other people do this thing, too, I thought I was over-sensitive, connected to another dimension, and/or just plain wacky. Well, even with the discovery, those thoughts haven’t changed.


I’m sure there is some cool British word for wacky. I shall allow Crazy Frog (Lingo) to cut loose from the deep emotional stuff for just a minute.


Crazy Frog is such a Jeeves. (Jeeves = resourceful helper; cool word, right?) He loves Yahoo! Here are some British words for wacky, according to Yahoo! Yes, I know, real alive Brits would be the best direct source, but no Britons happen to be in my house at the moment.


Other words for wacky, British style:


loony


gone off my rocker


nutjob


headbanger


stark raving mad


bonkers


a few sandwiches short of a picnic (cucumber sandwiches?)


completely mental


mad as a hatter


barmy


dippy


total spaz


and my favorite: away with the fairies.




With fairies, I’m thinking a lush green, mossy forest with magical waterfalls and pixie dust sweeping through the air—the smell of honeysuckles and hyacinth flowers.


Wouldn’t you know that hyacinth is my favorite smell, but I can’t pronounce the name. I sound like this when I say the flower name aloud: HIj-sint-HY-sin-t- Hy-nt-sin-ahhhh-ahhhhh. Poop!


I know this wacky list was from Yahoo! So I’m not so certain the list is entirely accurate, but assuming most of the words are, Crazy Frog is thinking, “You Brits have a lot of words for a crazy person.”


Crazy Frog is now trying on different hats, and considering changing his name from Crazy Frog to Sir Barmy. Crazy Frog loves the eccentric, daft, flighty elements of the word. The Daft-Hatter Frog is blowing kisses to himself in the mirror and tipping his hat.


Back up. Scratch that, like there’s no tomorrow. (Sorry if no tomorrow makes you think of the Mayan calendar.)


He just saw that barmy can mean dumbass. He is throwing off tall black hat, and placing daft-hat on nearest politician. I’m liking Crazy Frog.


I’m placing the barmy hat on one of my recent professors whose actions were dumbass in manner. Oops. That kind of slipped out from nowhere. Blame it on the Frog who’s away with the fairies.


So, as I was saying, I do this thing where I personify objects. The little girl in the video clip personified her shoes. She gives objects feelings. If one shoe is on her foot then she feels the other shoe is lonely. And I do the same thing. With shoes, and practically every inanimate object in my world!


For example, this may get a little gross, but if two globs of minty-green toothpaste are clinging on for dear life in my bathroom sink, and one glob is washed down, and the other glob is still there, I feel sorry for the lonely glob! And sorry for the other glob that I washed down the grimy drain, too. Fearing what awaits him. Notice the him. Nothing is an it. There is no it! Which has me thinking, if you haven’t read the children’s classic: A Wrinkle in Time, you ought to. And The Giver, while I’m going there.  Strings, strings, strings. Isn’t it cool, if you’re a regular reader of my ramblings, that you actually get my use of strings?




I even sometimes feel sorry for fruits and vegetables, like when I’m shoving cucumber peelings down the garbage disposal to their impending doom. When I used to fry (massacre) potatoes in a cast iron pan, when I was about the age of ten, the potatoes would make a squealing noise, like they were crying in agonizing, your killing us, pain. It was actually just the horrible sound of oil sizzling, but I felt for those particular potatoes. Sometimes I removed the ones that cried the loudest. But then I didn’t know what to do with them. Because who wants to be put in the garbage?


All this personifying is a big part of the reason eating and cooking, even preparing school lunches, is sometimes hard for me. It’s probably why I don’t ever care to empty a jar completely, or don’t finish the last pages of a book. Who wants to be brought to an end?


Personification is likely why I don’t eat meat; although, oddly enough, I have never felt sorry for chocolate. Except, of course, for the left over chocolate that must join the rest of his commune in my stomach, as soon as possible.


This marvelous discovery, this whole personification thing, explains why the other day, I was actually wondering how the strings of celery must be feeling as they were traveling through my digestive track. Sounds loony, right? I pictured the strings like they were at some waterslide park that ended in a tomb of bubbling stomach acid. Who does that?




Well! Supposedly sometimes some other people with Aspergers do that! So there! LV is sticking out her tongue, which is covered in blue from the jaw-breaker she is sucking on. (I even personify my thought processes!)


It’s okay in my heart that I feel sorry for crumpled paper that didn’t get tossed into the bin, and is now stranded on the floor, because there are other earthlings that feel sorry for the paper too.


What huge compassion I have. If you understand the compassion I have for inanimate objects and food, then image the immense compassion I carry for animals and people! It’s phenomenal.


My blog is personified, too. Bet you didn’t know that. It’s a living breathing entity. And when you are there reading my words you validate its life form. That’s why comments and stats are so important to me. If I know someone’s been here the blog is alive. Writing in a journal isn’t the same. The journal remains lonely and untouched. Get it?


Wow! I’m making huge revelations and connections. Now, the only issue is I have to turn off the study light and leave my poor computer idling in sleep mode, alone in the dark. Maybe you can keep him, Mr. Computer, company while I go frolic with the fairies. And why you are at it, when you make a comment, know you’re keeping Mr. Blog from isolation. Cheerio! (That’s goodbye not a cereal.)


Clarification:  I didn’t use personification in the exact way one is supposed to use the word. Personification references a rhetorical technique, one of many types of figure of speech or metaphor; whereas pathetic fallacy describes a disposition of the mind. ‘Pathetic’ isn’t derogatory; the word pathetic is in reference to being empathetic towards something. To further research look into pathetic fallacy.


Addition: My Blogging British Friend AilienHippy (BBF) added some more wacky words for me: “Barmy, Bonkers, Plonker, Noodle, Wally, Narna and Nutjob.” She does say, “…away with the fairies. And…He’s off his trolley.”  Laughing Housewife added her thoughts, too “…nutter, a bottle short of a six pack.” Schmidleysscribbling (hard one to spell with dyslexia, but a great lady) added: Bodman


Below is the video: Shelter by Jars of Clay. I picture us never walking alone. Upholding one another, and letting our inner light shine! I told you Little Me is a hope-filled melancholic. She can’t help herself.



			

	


				
					


	

			
Twenty-Eight: Giving a Child with Aspergers a Break
		

				

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Giving a Child with Aspergers a Break


Be. Let the words pour out of the child. Let the busy thoughts escape the mind. Let him speak as long as he wants about whatever he wants. Set no time limits. Welcome the rambling, digressions, repetitions, and dissertations. Be present, without interjection or correction. Allow time periods with no communication rules, lessons, examples, rights, or wrongs. Let the child release the pressure in his mind. Take long walks and car rides together, and just listen. Let him be himself.


Retreat. Grant her a day of rejuvenation, a full day with no visitors, appointments, outings, sports, or any mandatory doings. Keep the day free of all restrictions, chores, and obligations. Stay in pajamas. Allow escape, isolation, and repetitive activities. Give her the chance to rebuild her stamina. Provide solitude and comfort. Stay home from school one day. Peel away the rules and regiment. Let her retreat.


Environment. Ask about sensory concerns in the environment. What causes you discomfort in this space? How are the lights? The chair? The sounds? The smells? The flooring? The pictures? How do your clothes feel? Your hair? Your skin? Where is there discomfort? How can I help? What does it feel like? Describe it. How is the shower? The bath? Do you hurt? Where do you feel the safest sitting? What is hard to tolerate? Do you need sunglasses? A pillow? Earplugs? Let him create a more comfortable environment for himself.


Active Interest. Show interest in her special interest. Don’t call it an obsession or fixation. Call it an interest or passion. Participate. Explore and collect. Be together. Establish a schedule. Make the special interest a priority. Place the passion in a spotlight of acceptance. Establish a blog, newspaper, journal, comic, drawing, song, rhyme, act, or other creative outlet to express the interest. Let the creativity blossom. Welcome the opportunity for connection. Let go of the need to control, fix, alter, or end the special interest. Replace objection with acceptance. Replace disinterest with interest. Celebrate new discoveries. Use the interest as a therapeutic tool. Allow him the freedom to escape from the challenges of his world.


aKnowledge. Acknowledge characteristics, talents, skills, and intelligence. List positive attributes. Don’t pretend anything is easy. Be a warrior and teach how to be a warrior. Don’t try to change the child. Imagine how scary his world is. Tell him he is very brave. Tell him he is not alone in the world. Share others’ stories. Find an adult with similar challenges who is an effective role model. Watch movies about Aspergers. Know the child wants nothing more than to be good, to do good, and to feel good. Explain that he is never a failure and always a success. Tell him you hope he tries his best, but on the days he doesn’t feel like he can try, that’s okay. Tell him he has a right to hurt and be scared. Tell him he is a gift and that there is nothing he can do to make you stop loving him. Tell him he is perfect. Tell him even though you aren’t him, you can imagine how hard life must be for him. Ask how he is feeling. Never minimize or discount. Never say it’s not that bad or things could be worse. Say you are getting stronger and wiser every day. Believe in him.







© Everyday Aspergers, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. https://aspergersgirls.wordpress.com.  spectrumgirls@gmail.com




This article may be printed for  home and school use. Please keep the Everyday Aspergers© on the printed page. Thank you.

			

	


				
					


	

			
Day Twenty-Six: Patch Freak Makes Life Change!
		

				

						 | Aspergers Girls					

				

		
 


I’m going to attempt to use humor to explain a major life altering decision.


I’m back.


Bet you didn’t know I was gone.


I totally (California born and raised) slipped out of focus and got sidetracked for an hour’s time about the origin of the word humor. Why? Because I used the word humor in a sentence, Silly. And that led Brain away, like a string of yarn does for a kitten. This morning Brain’s string began at etymology: the origin or development of a word, affix, phrase, etc., and the string ended with black bile. Yucko-mania!


If Brain hadn’t allowed for a detour into Reasoning Forest, and instead he/she had left me in the moment, I fear I would be profusely apologizing for the spattering of snot and tears all over the computer screen. Yes, remarkably indeed, Brain returned me to an emotional state of equilibrium, with one quick, and rather boring, sidetrack.


And I have good news. When Brain examined the root origin of humor, which included words like phlegm, LV (little voice in my head) found us a new patch for our sash! Our lovely patch Melancholic is one of the four temperaments, the others being: Sanguine, Choleric, and Phlegmatic.


 


It is black in color, the Melancholic patch, and now firmly sewn on to LV’s slash, amongst her numerous other merit badges of distinction. She tore off the high-maintenance patch to make room for the new one. The patch of Melancholic represents the following traits: sensitive, intuitive, self-conscious, easily embarrassed, easily hurt, introspective, sentimental, moody, likes to be alone, empathetic, artistic, fussy and perfectionistic, deep, prone to depression, avarice, and gluttony!


Sidetrack: (Brain left again, but only for a brief stretch. He/She had to know the origin of origin. Call him/her crazy. I do. At first I was afraid that there was no origin of origin. Fear gripped, an anguish surfacing from the depths of Grendel’s mire: What if there is no origin of origin? Don’t panic. Luckily there is. The original meaning of origin is to rise, become visible, or from beginning source. I can live with that. I just wish the online etymology dictionary had the real origin of the universe. Which by definition would be the beginning source of the universe. Sadly, the definition only reads:  the cosmos, whole, and turned into one. No real origin there.)


The Melancholic patch is an improvement over some of the qualities listed on the other temperament patches, such as: hedonism (which is an ugly word to begin with), impetuous, prone to hypocrisy, and prone to sloth. Prone to sloth, makes me giggle. To learn more you can click here




I think from now on, when I’m in an Aspie funk, unable to make a decision, on overload, and/or plain overwhelmed with my brain, I will say: “I am prone to sloth, presently exhibiting attributes of the phlegmatic temperament.” Just warning you ahead of time.


Concerning the brief mentioning of my life altering decision, I was a daredevil speed racer in my mind for three hours straight last night, between the convenient hours of 11:00 pm and 2:00 am. Riding a cranked-up dirt bike up and around turn tunnels and across perilous ramps. LV had a lot of processing to do. And when I woke up, I endured two more hours. I did not know it was humanly possible to pour gallons of tears out of my tear ducts; but then again LV is sporting that hip new Melancholic patch.


The good news is the tears have cleared and hope has set in. There’s a seedling sprouting at this very moment at the belly of my spirit and stretching to the open sky.


What happened? You query, so sympathetically, (or not). Well…I took a whirl at taking care of Brain, LV, and Me, and got the Heck Out of Dodge! (Brain notes: Get the hell out of Dodge is in reference to Dodge City, Kansas, a favored location for westerns in the mid 20th century. Most notably, the saying was made infamous by the TV series Gunsmoke). And that’s the only reason my husband tolerates me–because I’m full of…interesting facts!


Sorry, about that. Suspense building. Drum roll. Shying away. Just going to splash it out in one big wave:


I got the Heck out of the University that I was attending for my Masters Degree in Counseling.


Kaput! We Gone!


There are a few distinct patches I’d like to stick on that subject, but I won’t.


For now, I’ll let Brain be, and LV rest, and Me, Little Sweet Me, I think I’ll treat her to an overdue retreat. Pardon me now, as I venture into my Phlegmatic Zone, and contemplate how to proceed through the glory of a new opened door.


Oh, Crap. Brain wants to explore truckers’ lingo! And LV is shouting, “Yes!”   The Gods truly must be crazy. I like the words: Gator Guts, Seat Cover, and Suds and Muds…you know you’re curious. Click  Truckers’ Slang Words or check out the video below:




Below You Can Read: All About the Origin of Humor, By Sir Brain  


 


Humor is Latin in origin and first meant liquid. The word represented moisture, especially the moisture of fluid of animal bodies, such as lymph.


Around 460 B.C. Hippocrates noticed that blood removed from the body separated into four parts: clear red, yellowish liquid that rises to the surface, dark liquid that settles at the bottom, and a whitish liquid. He and his students developed a theory based on Hipporcrates’ observations. Later the theory was expounded upon. Theorists believed mental health was a matter of a good balance of the four liquids (humors). The word humor eventually became connected with someone’s temporary state of mind. Humor’s meaning of amusement did not occur until the 1600’s.


The theory of bodily humors holds that each person produces four humors but that a preponderance of one relative to the others brings on sickness.  Fluid was thought to be part of the makeup of the body, and temperament, (meaning mixture), was determined by the proportions of four fluids (humors): blood, phlegm, bile, and black bile.


A predominance of blood, associated with the liver, equates to an optimistic and sanguine (confident) temperament. Sanguine is rooted in the original definition of ruddy or blood red face.


A predominance of yellow bile, associated with the spleen, equates to being choleric (short-tempered). Too much yellow bile and one viewed the world through a bilious eye. Choleric is rooted in the Greek khole, meaning bile.


A predominance of black bile, associated with the gall bladder, equate to a melancholic (pensively sad) temperament. From the Greek melas (black) and khole bile. Melancholia means too much black bile.


A predominance of Phlegm, associated with the lungs and brain, equates to being phlegmatic (slow and unexcitable).


Any imbalance of these humors made a person unwell and perhaps eccentric. Through the passing of time humor took on the meaning of oddness.


Fasting is thought to bring humors into balance. Humorism postulates that each person is born with a basic temperament.


You can find more information about the origin of humor here: In MY BRAIN!