This just came to me….
1. You have had an undeniable desire since childhood to serve and give back to the world. No matter the avenue you partake, you find yourself once again in service to others.
2. You give your all in hopes of being seen. You long for connection, for understanding, to be removed from an overbearing since of isolation. Recognizing you are part of a greater whole, you wish to contribute your part to make sense of the world and your surroundings. You are haunted by a recognizable desire to make the world better, and yet accept, to a greater degree, that all is as is meant to be. As you are part of a delicate union, you recognize yourself in others. In longing to be seen, you are in actuality longing to unravel the world around you, to pour your understanding of self into the understanding of another.
3. You give and give and give, and know that you are giving without expectation or anything in return. You do not long for fame and attention or monetary compensation, and find the ways of the material world somewhat off-putting. You recognize yourself in others, in their temptations to dive into the illusion of want and the collection of trophies. Yet, you desire not these things at the deepest level of self. You know your good works benefit the whole when they are released from attachment, need and craving.
4. You substantiate your surroundings, continually making sense of your world and your place in the world, diving within to bring up the parts of you that are evidence of truth, justice, and love. You reflect upon your goodness and the goodness of the world, and shed the parts of you that are no longer needed. You do not punish yourself or corner yourself, but discern with self-acceptance and understanding what you have collected that is ready for release.
5. You wear your heart on your sleeve. Your soul on your sleeve. Your essence on your sleeve. You are authentic and true to your core. You become confused when others seem to be waiting for you to shed the layers of pretense and expose hidden motives. There are no motives beyond wanting to contribute and connect, to serve, and to alleviate the suffering that comes when the whole is not living as one.
6. You desire to be heard. You desire to be held, embraced, loved, and taken in by a source unknown to you. You want to return to a home somewhere that you cannot find but search for each moment of your life.
7. You are awaken to the ways of the world and to the world beyond what is here. You understand the complexities of the spiritual texts and the complexities of the spiritual condition. You embrace all beings, all sects, all religions, all people. There is nothing that causes you anger, except your own emotion of fear. You readily recognize fear inside of you and fear inside of others.
8. You are greatly affected by the soul of someone who is suffering. You can feel their pain and long to help. You can often see ways in which the person would benefit, but know enough of what not to do and say. You wait. You are patient with the world, but at times, many times become forlorn, confused, and torn open—exposed. You are greatly confused when people accuse you of being disloyal, dishonest, false, or unkind. You pride yourself in kindness, and the very pride eats at you, for pride is a discomfort to your soul.
9. You wonder if beneath everything there is this person who is unkind and not nice, even though she hasn’t shown herself to you. You sense there is a darker side, but you know that you are good, you are pure, you are meant to do good in the world. You worry when another points the finger at you in analysis and cold-hearted criticism, because you feel the penetrating anger of the onlooker. You feel their distrust and hatred. The feelings of intense vengeance pierce you and you wonder how people could exist who have such harshness inside. You wonder if you are the harshness as well, and try to wash away this part of you.
10. You are the light, and you know others are the light. You sense this in everything that is you and everything that is another. You know there is a dark as well, and you sense this, too. The dark comes when you are close to breakthrough or reaching a new plateau of service. The dark comes through the shadow of others’ actions and the shadow of circumstances. Yet, you continue to fight through the pain.
11. With every trial you come out stronger and wiser and brighter, even though you thought for certain the last event would surely be the end of your journey. Your suffering is non-ending, yet, you endure and endure. You know no other way to be except as your true self, your loving self, and your giving self. Nothing of this world makes sense to you that does not equate to love, honor, respect and union. You are mystified and unnerved by violence and injustice. You feel misplaced. You feel lost. But above all, through everything, you feel hope.
12 thoughts on “441: Light Worker”
Thank you. 🙂
God I needed that. Thank you!!!
🙂 thank you for reading
“You are the light, and you know others are the light.” Wordless joy, wordless pain.
Thank you Sam xxx
Sending you some light 🙂
received. thank you 🙂
entered my soul like a brilliant beam of light.. why do you think some of us cannot help but try to embody generosity and goodness to those around us when it is all-too-often a thankless existence?
it’s the beam of light in us, I believe. 🙂
I wonder if people know what you mean when you say light workers want to be seen. I understand this desire. People could not understand when I questioned why they could not see “me”…what I used to call the “real me,” while at the same time wanting to hide the physical “me.” My flesh never felt real to me and still does not to this day. It is as if I am overly aware that my flesh is only a temporary shell and that I will one day return to my true self. I want to pull my body inward so tight that I implode and disappear completely only leaving the most faint residue of myself.
My desire to be seen is not meant to be realized by flesh or fleshly eyes. My desire is to be seen as the “me” that is intertwined with the pulse of life…the “me” that moves silently through time feeling the essence of human nature…a nature of old…the nature that humans are most unfamiliar with…a nature that is at it’s core the most organic, honest and enlightened self…a self not bound by flesh. That is the “me” that I want others to see. That is the “me” that I am most comfortable with.
I am delighted that I have the great fortune of knowing you and knowing that you see “me” and I see “you.”
so beautiful, your words, and light. Yes, I understand deeply. xo