338: You Are The Block

Today I participated in being present.
I got in my van and drove where I felt drawn to go.
I found myself on the waterfront by the boat docks, and walked lightly along the pathway.
I felt grounded into the earth and protected, and very much loved.
I noticed the sky and all the sounds about me. I noticed many things that I hadn’t noticed before.
The sun paid a visit and peeked out from the clouds, and I was invited by this lovely block structure to lean and take in the sunlight on my face.
I closed my eyes and just let myself be.

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I thanked the block art.
I have always admired people who could be still and with themselves and find a gentle resonating connection to the earth and with their inner being.
Today I was one of those connecters.

I walked past a building that invited me in. And there I greeted a flyer about a movement class. I kept the paper and will reflect on the opportunity.

As I traveled back to my van, I practiced letting go of thoughts and took in many sounds and sensations.
When I was on the road again, I drove past a small bakery.
I treated myself to lunch there, the most sensational lunch.
I savored every bite with awareness and pleasure. The fork tickled me. The sautéed mushroom, bread, and egg saluted me. I found myself giggling inside at the images in the food. I found myself giving repeated thanks and gratitude.
I soaked in the goodness, and as I had done before, I kept repeating the words “Love, love, love.”

I was continually brought back to the present. Every movement and ever feeling inside of my body felt magical.

The world looks different now.
Wherein sensory stimuli could sometimes overwhelm me, now I am intrigued by all of the motion of the world.
As I ate, I smiled at the homeless man outside the window. I watched him eat on the bench. He had much food. I imagined we were eating together. When he was finished, and approached where I sat, a glass pane separating us, we locked eyes and smiled together.
We’d eaten together in my heart.

I took over a half of an hour to eat one sandwich. I wondered why I always ate so fast before, when every bite was an opportunity for acceptance and gratitude.
I listened to the sound of people and watched them move. I took in the pitch of voices and the color of clothes. With every thought I released all judgment.
I felt tremendous joy of being alive, and gave thanks for the ability to appreciate the moment and my life.
When I moved from my chair, I did so with gentle intention. No anxiety was in my psyche or my physical being. Everything about me radiated serenity.
A bakery worker moved towards me to collect my plate. We shared a sentence and our eyes smiled. I felt such warmth and human connection.

When I drove again, if any sorrow arose, manifested by an ache in my heart and gut, I imagined the sorrow, the shape of the sorrow. To me, the sorrow appeared a twisted colorless ribbon. I let the sorrow rise and then I held the sorrow.
When I held the sorrow, sorrow evaporated.
Each time the sorrow rose, I let the deep ache come to me.
I felt the intensity of suffering. I felt the tears of my soul, and then, through awareness and acceptance, I held the pain once more, and once more again.

Today I was happy despite my sorrow. Today I was sorrow-filled despite my happiness. And neither was the winner.
Moment after moment I returned back to the present, leaving the sorrow and happiness to the space of emptiness.
I see neither sorrow or happiness as my partner or friend, and neither as my foe.
I accept where I am at and let the river of peace flow through me.

I do not stand in judgment of myself, and with this freedom I do not stand in judgment of my passing neighbor.
I do not stand in judgment of my passing neighbor, and with this freedom I do not stand in judgment of my self.

I planned nothing. I thought not of the future, nor did I linger long in the past. I just was. I just am.

If ever there was joy to be found immeasurably, it was in the simplicity of my being.

Now as I sit here, I feel embraced.
I know not why or how or from where this love comes; I release; I release the source and I release the cause.
Nothing matters, while everything matters.

Today I am thankful, not for anything or anyone, not for a singular experience or emotion; today I am thankful because I recognize that with the release of attachment, I am at last releasing self into the ocean of life. I am a bird swimming in the blue. I am a fish flying through the sky. All is a reflection, one upon the other.
And everywhere I look is beauty.

I am looking at you now. Beautiful one. Special one. Dear one. Lovely lovely light-filled soul.
I am looking at you, and you are all.
You are the sunshine in my face. You are the sensation of pleasure dripping off of my fork. You are the homeless man smiling with his eyes. You are the earth smiling with your heart.
You are everything to me, as I am to you.
And I accept your love and grace.
I accept you just as you are right now. Just right where you are.
You are divinely perfect.
You are the block.
You are the art in the park.
The place where one can rest and lean and soak in the goodness of the world.
Thank you.

Photo on 3-7-13 at 3.47 PM

Day Forty-Two: On Leadership

I wrote this in (2010) Heard in one sitting. I wrote what I heard.

On Leadership

To lead is to forge the field. You (as leader) are no less responsible for beauty than the farmer who plants the seed. For he is useless is he not, without the sun beating down on the hearth of earth, the weed gently departing as worm spirals onward, the Cheshire Cat of yesterday* breaking way for formidable weather, as rain trickles down in her gentleness, neither drying or erasing.

For the farmer is a necessity, a part of the cyclic process of rebirth, but neither the ultimate piece nor the entire piece. For what is a garden without seed, without proper care?

Who is to care for the crops once they are bloomed? Again the farmer gathers and cleanses, again he replants. But what is it that he doth replant? Is it not the miracle of seed? The tiny element created within creation?

You are not but a worthy planter, less these seeds are worthy. You are not a true caller of spirit, less spirit is provided. The farmer no less provides the seed, as the sea bird the ocean. Still he dives to the depths of darkness and retrieves great beauty and nourishment, knowing not from which this beauty grew or was born. So a farmer is less a farmer, and more a grower.

A leader is a grower, an incubator nurturing the gift of living element and caretaking as the hen to warm the haven until arrival.

Your role is vital. All roles are vital. But lead first with the gentleness of the angels. Spread your wings and protect before climbing the mountain from valley to preach. Seat not yourself center or first, or either behind. Seat yourself in the position most needed, ever shifting to meet the requirements of the seekers, who lead themselves, a multitude of seeds waiting to blossom and enrich, and even say forthright ignite thy world.

When you ask of leadership on how to lead, and the right way to lead: you lead by example first. In how gently you remember your place; that is that your place is not at the head of the table or the back of the room, but in the center of hearts where you justly belong.

Seek not position of fortitude, or strength in numbers, seek position of greatness of heart and mind, and fortitude of the millennium, drawing from the well of knowledge for greatest understanding, and comparing this not to others who draw closer carrying their own buckets, however burdensome or heavy.

Keep your bucket light, so to fill it again and again, reviewing the process of discovery as a fresh student, excited and renewed. To carry a heavy bucket is a burden to the soul. To fill and fill without wanting to stop to rest is to bend your body into a position to be broken. Rest my child and refill the bucket when you are thirsty. Seek forth knowledge, as you seek for water, enough to quench your thirst, but not too much to bloat and stop the process from reaching its beneficial potential.

Think you not on the bloated bodies on the beach**, think you on the rain clouds that fill and fill and then down pour. They reach a point when the water must fall, when the truth must drip down to a different dimension. And so is with us, as to you. Fill and then spill down thy truth. In this way you will remained balanced and fulfilled, if not re-filled.

Speak again, We on leadership. Judge not the leaders before you. They are as unique as each sunset, as brilliant and welcoming as each sunrise.

Judge no one and nothing, as you know each and every is a teacher in guise for your betterment.

It is true you will see in the mirror which is most relevant to present itself, but do not gaze into the mirror for long periods of time, a glance is enough to indicate inner change. Glance with lingering eyes and run the risk of the desire for change of what you see, when in truth you see nothing but your own self-created image. So in this way, view the mirror in passing, take what is needed, and thusly adjust. No more, no less.

Leadership in your eyes is a priority, as you were built for leadership, in the way you were raised in the desires We planted in your heart.

But there is not a leader that you will emulate or you will find, for you are uniquely you, and in this way you will (do) lead like a joy-filled child, skipping down the hill to the clear, and welcoming values of gratitude and hope.

Lead them not so much to the waters or the valley, as to the welcoming spirit that waits inside them each.

You will remain child-like for every, as long as you choose to walk this path on this earth, and in this way you will be trusted and welcomed by many.

You shall not lose you humility, passion, want, and need for love—and in this way, as a child you shall remain entirely human, carrying with you the divine perfection in the eyes of your youth.

Do not emulate another’s softness of character, the quietness of creature, or the one who does not laugh as heartily, for your laughter is a key, a vibrational key to break open rifts and so called blockages. Just as your tears shall open gates, so shall your child-like laughter. Do not seek to become serious and unattainable, for you will become all that you seek.

The innocent shall seek you, for they shall see the innocent untouched spirit within you. You and yours shall see many blessings as you follow this calling that we know has not and is not always perceived as this word easy.

Lead first and foremost with your heart. Listen to the beat of reason less and the calling of your need to heal more. Fix less. Help more.

In leading you will gently release your need to know how to lead, for you will become, and embody leadership through a natural process.

We will guide you and you need (as always) not fear. There is nothing fearful in leading the innocent and guiding them to reclaim their voice. No one can hurt the one who is guarded by a legion of angels. So rest in the comfort we are with you, and whomever you touch we shall gather in our wings and let quietly sleep in the knowledge of peace.

Remember who you are, and in remembering you will forget the shadows called fear.

* The cat’s grin remained suspended in air even after the whole of the cat disappeared. Yesterday is smiling upon us and remains, even though we cannot see this yesterday (cat).

** Dead bodies on a beach are from  Sam’s past experience.

The word every is used in replacement of every-one