438: Brushed Thoughts

pin it my friend

This is a photo of a photo recently taken. It is the first one in years that I feel like captures me.
This is a photo of a photo recently taken. It is the first one in years that I feel captures me.

I have these type of thoughts all day long, even in my dream-state. They just come. Whisper to me. I see them as a visual concept I cannot describe. It’s not an image, but it is tangible and malleable, like invisible clay, the shadow left behind after the clay is gone. I can play with it and feel the vibration shifting and meandering and pulsating through me. When the words come, they paint themselves onto the blankness where the shadow plays. I watch as they unfold, and then work together to rearrange the words into the same frequency that I feel. I feel the pulse behind each letter, and the life force behind the formation of each segmented part. The rhythm, the punctuation, the formation and pattern of each word and sentence, all carry a vibration. I can feel if the structure I choose resonates with the initial visual concept and sensation. This is a sense I do not understand completely, a line connecting into something that is soothing, very real, and very much filled with light. I go here, with a pure heart and mind, open to whatever pours through. It isn’t easy and it isn’t hard; it just is. And I try my best to take no ego there. Instead I feel as a child-heart, over-flowed with joy in discovering a present left prepared and ready for opening. A gift to be savored and shared. And then I wait, for the others to see the unwrapped present, to hold it and honor its existence. In this place, with the words alive, I can breathe, for I have done my part, for a purpose beyond self.

I spent the last couple days, just clearing my mind and writing what came out. It generally takes me a few minutes to piece together my heart-mind intention. I made these into many posters that you can find on my like-page listed in the left-hand column.

Brushed Thoughts

* Let’s meet in the middle of the discombobulated space of energy where my truth does not match your truth, and sit there, hand in hand, embracing one another, teacher to teacher, soul to soul.

* A person’s intention is reflected in an energetic vibration. When words are created from a foundation of ego-desires, the receiver will feel a discrepancy in energy between what is spoken and what is felt. This response is not judgment. It is heart-mind discernment—the spirit discerning the truth beyond the words.

* The new conformity is to dislodge parts of self that are ‘negative.’ We are bombarded with: focus on the positive, speak of good, share only if it’s constructive. An obvious error arises through analysis of the restricted perimeters; for who is this one to decide the definition of negative, bad, and destructive? Whose doctrine, dogma, or philosophy is the dictator? And what of the infinite variables between right and wrong? Your suffering is my suffering. Your silence only perpetuates our condition. I want to know all of you, not the preconditioned ghost of you.

* Sometimes when you say, “I love you,” I feel a space of emptiness; not because I fear losing your adoration but because I know I can never demonstrate through actions or words how beautiful you are to me.

pinit conditional

* Anyone who attempts to fix, bend, or break you, is merely attempting to slip his reality into yours, in effort to make sense of his illusion of self. You aren’t responsible for what anyone thinks about you, only about what you think about others. When we learn to love everyone in completion, the truth is evident, our brothers and sisters solicit pain whilst in need of love.

* I love my authentic vulnerability, my inability to be anything less or more than I am, the constant way I come back to the core essence of self, in having Asperger’s I have been gifted the intuitiveness to know self, to embrace self, and to accept self. In so doing, I can love you unconditionally. There is no greater ability.

* I do not understand the motivation behind game-playing, manipulation, trickery, ill-will, and cruelty. I wasn’t born with the genes. And I am better for it.

pin soul to soul

10 thoughts on “438: Brushed Thoughts

  1. Beautiful post, Sam, and I love your first poster, but I also love this last “brushed thought” the best…where we can meet with un-matching truths and still embrace each other for who we are…very beautiful..xxx

      1. Exactly and I wish the world would learn that, too, then we could all “live together” in peace…world peace, an unreachable concept, I’m afraid, but then again, nothing is impossible…:)

  2. I identified with your comments in your writing about rhythm. If I need to write things down, I find there is a certain way that it needs to be expressed and I will know if there is a certain word or tone to a sentence that is discordant and does not fit, and I have to change it until it feels right. its like my feelings have the final say in the matter as to how things may be perfectly expressed. I also feel there is a rhythm to conversation, too. I have studied in detail people’s reactions to certain ways/things I say and do and evaluate conversations and how I would do/say things differently to make the conversation feel right. In saying that there is a “right”, I do not mean that there is a “wrong” (as what is right may feel different for different people) of that people should always agree with each other to make a “feel right” or perfect conversation. Its what is right to me. When I hear conversations, writing, see the things people do, there always seems a “rhythm”, a “tone” or “flow” to whatever things are being said/ done for things to feel right, whatever right may be. “Rhythm” (or lack of) to me is the word that describes best how everything should be working so it feels right, from the obvious rhythm i.e. the rhythm of life to tiny interactions between one being and another. I hope this makes some kind of sense, but even if it doesn’t I want to say thank you for your posts. On many occasions, they really help me feel like someone takes my thoughts and feelings from inside me and writes them down. Please keep going. 🙂

Thank you for your comments :)

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