Day 98: The Day I Lost My Butt

This is a true story.

My husband took this photo and the other. He is gifted that way.

I was with a crowd of people the day I lost my butt. I searched everywhere for my butt. In desperate need of a butt, I clasped my two hands over a stranger’s butt, imitated pulling off her butt, and then I tried to fit her butt onto my butt. But her butt wouldn’t stay on me. When the stranger asked, “How does my butt fit?” I responded, “Too small.” And with a frown, I sighed, shrugged my shoulders, hung my head low, and gave her back her butt.

As I walked in embarrassment without at butt, I covered the place my butt had been with my hands. Sometimes I slid across the floor to hide my missing butt or I squatted down and walked low to the ground. When I sat, I placed my hands beneath me on the chair to protect the skin where my butt had been. Other times I sat on my knees.

Off and on for an hour, I searched for my butt. One time I asked the crowd, “Have you seen my butt?”

I looked under my chair for my butt. I looked in corners and underneath people’s legs for my butt. Later, in desperation, I found a microphone, and again asked, “Has anyone seen my butt?”

No one had seen my butt.

After we left the crowd, and returned home, for weeks my three sons, and sometimes my husband, would peer from around the corner, at random intervals, and ask, “Where’s your butt?”  One day my family gathered together on the couch to view the recording of the day I lost my butt.

It didn’t matter where I went in our home. I could be sitting on the toilet, climbing the stairs, or cooking dinner, and someone in our house would ask, “Where’s your butt?”

I will always remember the day I lost my butt.

My butt is back now. My butt actually never disappeared. I only thought my butt had vanished. In reality I’d been hypnotized on stage to believe my butt was stolen.

I believe at times we all think we’ve lost our butts, or at least we believe we’ve lost a portion of ourselves. Many of us think an essential part of us is missing or lacking. We believe we aren’t worthy, aren’t enough, aren’t special, and aren’t lovable; when in actuality we came into the world fully equipped with everything we need. Our butts are firmly attached.

Nothing is missing and nothing has been taken away. We are worthy, we are enough, we are special, we are lovable, but we forget. When we think we are lacking that is like our mind tricking us into think we have no butt. When we think we are lacking, we walk the world like our butts are missing. We hang our heads low, we hide, we search, we ask, we fear and worry.

We trick ourselves. We hypnotize ourselves into thinking we are lacking when everything is right there where it is supposed to be. All we have to do is to reach down and grab our gifts. They are right there waiting.

So the next time you find yourself lacking, remember the story of the lady who lost her butt. Think of her standing on stage, speaking into a microphone and asking, “Has anyone seen my butt?” That is exactly what you are doing when you are searching for your worthiness.

Don’t ever think you’ve lost your butt.

Your worthiness is firmly attached to you.

Now get out there and shake your booty!


The answer for yesterday’s post was number 9. Number 9 was the fiction.

Number 9 was a little bit true. The object was a tampon that flew across the cafeteria and hit someone in the head, but I ducked, covered, and ran before anyone knew I was the culprit. No one picked it up and handed it to me.

Don’t feel bad, my husband guessed the wrong one.

For those that guessed number  7, you were close. I could have worded that fact more clearly. I did review 100 men, but I reviewed the recordings they left, then I called a couple dozen back. So, if you guessed that number, you get a free pass.

Everything else was true. Including Patty Hearst and the swimsuit model. Thanks for participating. I had a great time reading your lists.

38 thoughts on “Day 98: The Day I Lost My Butt

  1. Great analogy….your stories always go in the most amazing places… I guessed 9! Woohoo! My weekend has started well. Btw. Love that photo of you!

    1. I think you were one of the few people who guessed the right answer. Bravo! You have unlimited access to my blog any day or night as a prize. And for a bonus you can call me Samtastic as much as you want! I’ll even smile at your OK!!!!’s. You are a bright light in my life. Thank you for being you, for your poet heart, and kindness. Have a great weekend, David.
      Sam the Green Jam (Alien Slime)

      1. Yay!!! i get Freddy Mercury:) Always a good thing…freedom to use Samtastic anddddd unlimited access…perrrrrffeeecctt..lol…Big smiles here…(child’s soccer match now) Enjoy your morning:))

    1. I knew some people would think I’d lost my mind! lol
      I almost put a warning atop….please read the whole thing, I am not crazy
      But a true artist must go on 🙂
      Thank you. I love reading the positive spirit in all of your words. Even when you are worried, processing, or upset, there is a line of hope and love underneath everything you scribe.
      Bravo to you!
      Sam 🙂

    1. Yeah! Fun is beneficial, yes? Clapping my hands. Glad you enjoyed. Wonder when melancholic me will reappear??? Great to see you here. Must go visit your blog. 🙂 Sam

  2. remind me. all were true except one? but the true one didn’t really happen the way you said? just very close but not exactly?

      1. so then really none were true. the reason i didn’t go with the feminine hygiene product (love that term) was because of how it happened to land at the feet of the most popular guys. if not for that, i’d have gone that way.

      2. No all were true, except 9. Everything happened but number 9. 🙂 I threw the popular guy in there on purpose.
        Thanks for commenting. Hope I haven’t confused you more. lol
        Sam

  3. lol…love this one too, Sam 🙂 🙂 oh how funny…losing your butt…lol…i think #7 was one of my guesses 🙂 yaaaayyyy for me (still not a winner, though) ha ha ha…pretty picture of you there…love your hat 🙂 🙂 love the music…sometimes i wish i had a bigger butt…but my boyfriend loves my butt like it is now…lol…very true what you said…we’re all perfect the way we are 🙂 🙂 thanks for another fantastic read…love and hugssssssss 🙂 🙂

  4. La La La La La!! (dancing and twirling because I got the answer right 🙂 I could see the event happening up until you said one of the guys picked it up to handed it to you. Something moved in me and said it would not be possible to endure that level of embarrasment. At least it would not be possible for me 🙂

    I love this post!! I did think that you shared a couple marbles with someone else for a moment until I had my own memory of a somewhat similar occurance. When I was a teen I wanted to have a bigger butt and expressed this to my mom. We went out the next day to purchase a special girdle that had extra material in the back. It was designed to push and form you naturally into the special area of the garment producing the look of a larger rounder bottom. Well I put on the girdle and slipped into my favorite slacks. I ran into the kitchen, turned around and asked my mom how I looked. She looked at me and with tears welling in her eyes, a roaring laughter came out of her so loud that I turned around in disbelief. She could’nt answer me, she was laughing so hard. So I went to the full lentgh mirror to take a gander at my bottom. I was mortified, all you could see through my favorite green slacks were two wrinkled oval shapes over my butt. The girdle had nothing to push into place. It actually looked like someone had stolen my butt and left the saggy wrinkled skin behind. LMBO!! Ooops, not literally 🙂

    Your posts bring back the best memories for me. Thanks Sam!! I needed a good laugh today 🙂

    Luv you,

    Jackie

    1. Congratulations. You are a winner!!!!! Scan up to David’s comment and watch that YouTube! Go Jackie!!! Big hugs to you.

      Yes, impossible to endure that level of embarrassment! You are so right!

      LMBO! Hilarious. What a fantastic story and image. hee hee

      Glad you had a good laugh at my losing my butt!

      Love you, Cutie
      Sam 😉

  5. I fully intended to provide a list to you, but forgot and ran out of time1
    I have been busy and a bit sick. The sick part seems to be passing.
    Anyway, this was a good post. What I don’t understand is that most women I talk to would be happy if they lost their butt….
    Scott

  6. “We hypnotize ourselves into thinking we are lacking when everything is right there where it is supposed to be. All we have to do is to reach down and grab our gifts.”

    This is the truth! I love the way you lead us into it. Thank you.

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